What the Florida!? – Week of February 7-13


Oliver Jamias, Contributor

Man Robs Store Dressed as Sonic the Hedgehog

Bank workers became entangled in a rather strange incident when a man attempted to rob the establishment using a Sonic the Hedgehog mask as a disguise. The robber was seen using a hammer as his main weapon, demanding the bank teller to give him cash. When the teller did not immediately comply, he started banging on the window with his hammer as a threat. The man was deterred when another bank worker confronted him, causing him to run away and escape. The Sonic impersonator succeeded in fleeing the scene, although nobody was injured and no money was stolen. Police immediately responded to the call for assistance, and are currently pursuing the target, who is currently as large.

Train Smashes Stolen Car into House

A man, whose name is not officially disclosed to the public yet, experienced a series of unfortunate events involving several vehicles. It all started when he realized that he had lost track of where his car was following a night at a bar. In an attempt to find it, he stole a nearby car and proceeded to drive around the area to search for his lost vehicle. However, he ended up getting stuck on railroad tracks while a train was approaching him. The man managed to jump out of the car to safety mere seconds before the train collided with it. The man then ran to a nearby fruit stand and stole the forklift stationed there, before being confronted by deputies. He tried to justify his two thefts by saying that he needed to find his car, but he was arrested anyways. The car that was hit by the train crashed through the home of a sleeping family, and while nobody was injured, it was enough to wake them up and alarm them. He is to be charged with grand theft and criminal mischief.

Man Fishes up Sniper Rifle

Duane Smith, along with his 11 year old grandson, Allen Cadwalader, caught something unexpected when they went magnet fishing on the weekend. The two were expecting results like spare metal scraps or old bottle caps, but instead they reeled up several sniper rifle components. To make things even more surprising, this was the first time that the two had ever went magnet fishing. Smith only became interested in magnet fishing after watching several YouTube videos on it, before getting the idea to take his nephew out for a magnet fishing trip, thinking that it would be more engaging for him than normal fishing. Smith, who is a retired soldier specializing in sniping, estimates the total value of the caught goods to be about $20,000. No ammunition was found in the guns, and Smith turned in the weapons to the local police force.